by
Jaye B.
(editor’s note: at the request of a few Reset News readers, I’m begrudgingly providing a shortened version of my autobiography. It has had a very torturous existence starting with the fact that the publisher that gave me the assignment to write it reneged on me. I then tried self publishing it and made the mistake of using Lulu to do so and of hiring this very incompetent proofreader and editor who ruined it. She ended up hanging herself a few years later for reasons that are unknown to me. I burned all the copies I had in my next-door neighbor’s leaf burner. The only real perk my book got was when Paul Krassner asked me if I would take his place to give a talk on it in Valencia Spain at the conspira-noia conference there, which I did. I’m guessing it was a blessing in disguise that it didn’t get published in a high profile way. The PDF copy that I have is turning out to be very difficult to edit make it even more frustrating, seeing that I cannot copy and paste the photographs of which there are many throughout. You will have to enlarge the pics as you read. It’s just not worth my time struggling to get them resized. If I had the means to get an actual computer with Adobe PDF on it and an actual private place to write in-then maybe I could. Trying to edit it on Substack is proving to be just as much of a nightmare. At present time I’m putting this together sitting in my car in the Walmart parking lot, such is the fate of a targeted individual who has dared to speak the truth. If you are inclined to do so, please support my work. Links are below on how you can do so. TIA and God bless.)
1.
In November of 1959 on the day that the Clutter family was murdered in Kansas and Goddess Pele vented her volcanic rage on the big Island of Hawaii in a devastating eruption of which the lava is still cooling down from at present, I was admitted to Methodist Hospital in Minneapolis at the ripe age of four months old, diagnosed as having spinal meningitis. I was at this facility for nearly a month and survived the ordeal when most children who came down with this disease did not at the time. Forty two years later while in meditation one day, I started having recollections of this traumatic event that I hadn’t thought about at all, other than fretting over the total loss of hearing in my right ear as the result of a ‘very high fever’ which I had. Or so I was told. I couldn't quite understand why these memories starting flooding in so persistently from my unconscious mind and began seeking for answers.
At the time I had been making a name for myself in the world of conspiracy, publishing articles on the internet which were gaining considerable attention. A piece I wrote, "How to F*&% (with) Freemasons was getting heavy traffic. I found myself flaming with rabid pit bulls such as William Cooper who called me a ‘Pimp in a time warp’ for daring to suggest that he integrate some love and light into his life. MKULTRA was nothing more than a sidebar curio in my estimation, yet it jumped out at me constantly during prolonged, Google fueled forays into the world of mind control and within the pages of the dozens of conspiracy books sent to me for review purposes.
In these books, such as Mind Control/World Control by the late Jim Keith, I learned that the CIA had been conducting experiments with trauma-based mind control and that it was getting leaked to the outside world, prompting the destruction of potentially indicting documents related to these projects, primarily during the Nixon administration. Most curious of all to me was what is now known as ‘Project Paperclip’, where many high echelon Nazis were brought to the United States after WWII to infiltrate corporations, primarily in the aero space industry a la Werner von Braun and dozens of university departments as well. During my research, I learned that the documentation existed that conclusively proved that the U. S. Army had been conducting biological warfare experiments in Minneapolis, Minnesota where I was born as well as spraying such toxic substances as zinc cadmium sulfide over Minneapolis, which caused birth defects in many newborns. Still a bit unwilling to connect the dots, I continued my inquiry into conspiracy literature, not fully aware of what was driving me to do so. It all seemed so distant to me, occupying a remote netherworld, a malign La La land that seemed to only entertain me in a morbidly satisfying way. However, when I further delved into the works of such authors as Mae Brussel who was dedicated to exposing paperclip Nazis, things started to hit home in a way that shattered the lenses of my rose colored glasses and left the shards deeply embedded in my dilated pupils. The reality of the existence of trauma based mind control was getting much too close for comfort.
My father had received his Ph.d in Psychology in 1953 from the University of Minnesota, the very same year the MKULTRA program began. The psychology that he and many others were being indoctrinated with at that time was of the Behavior Modification variety as embodied in the work of B. F. Skinner. For those of you not familiar with Skinnerian psychology, the basic tenet is that we have no free will and that we are completely and totally molded by our environment.
The infamous Skinner Box he invented and subjected his own daughter to, had profound implications for myself because it is within this kind of box that I was born into, a world devoid of emotional warmth, caring and other nurturing elements that create a healthy ‘holding environment’ for an infant. Yet, none of this seemed to matter in retrospect as I, at the time, considered myself to be a fairly well functioning human being able to hold a job, converse normally with others and express my creative side through my writing, music and artwork. However, when insights into the disease I suffered as an infant would surface in meditation, I couldn't help but put the pieces of this very peculiar puzzle together and the overall picture, once these pieces had been sufficiently assembled, was that I had been deliberately subjected to trauma based mind control during an extremely vulnerable phase of my life via a form of operant conditioning taken to its utmost extreme.
One winter afternoon, I came upon an unassuming little pamphlet in my father’s library that I was dusting at the time, sandwiched within the pages of his hardcover Ph.D thesis. A History of Psychology in Autobiography by Richard M. Elliott caught my attention and I discovered that this odd ditty was penned by the "Chair" of the Psychology Department during the time of my father’s tenure at the University in the early 50's. Elliott had autographed it on the inside cover with “Best Wishes” crammed tightly in the upper right hand corner, with his initials underneath. In this revealing book, which I read in its entirety standing next to the vacuum cleaner, I discovered that this fellow bragged about bringing B. F. Skinner to the University, wrote about his own involvement in the psychological testing of WWI soldiers, prior to coming to the U. (B. F. Skinner was, incidentally, army intelligence material according to Jim Keith) and hobnobbing with prominent figures as Robert M. Yerkes of primate research fame and German psychologists such as Munsterberg . My hackles rose and goose bumps proliferated instantly over my flesh. In response to the shock, my synapses fired rapidly, inspiring me to conclude on the spot that I had been deliberately infected with meningitis as a prelude to being subjected to trauma based mind control.
Quite a heavy revelation indeed and one that was infused with much irony considering my rather cavalier and haughty take on conspiracy when I first started writing about it. I managed to finish reading this disguised confessional which was teeming with clues that this guy was some CIA mole. I made sure to ground out my insights by not only writing about them but drawing images of what I was seeing within. Even though my ego reflexively rejected this, the synchronicities that were occurring at the time were really messages from my higher spiritual self signaling to me that what I was seeing within had some kind of tangible relevance and was not merely some gratuitous mirage emanating from my unconscious mind to compensate for some lack born of insufficient parenting in my childhood-i.e. attempting to embody it all in some ‘conspiracy theory’ that would be satisfying to my ego.
Opposition was coming in from all directions and dimensions during this time. Not only from disturbed and desperate individuals hiding behind e-mail addresses and trying to trespass upon my psyche, but also in the three-dimensional world as well, such as Mark Phillips who threatened to put me in prison for a book review I wrote trashing his side kick Cathy O’Brien’s Trance Formation of America and the unlikely scenario of the woman who he supposedly rescued from MK programs being forced to have sex with Bill and Hillary Clinton, their dog, et. al. However, because of the nearly 15 years of sitting meditation that I had been practicing on a regular basis, it enabled me to connect with a part of my psyche that we all possess and which cannot be perverted, manipulated, altered, co-opted distorted or colonized in any way shape or form. I started to write more and more about this, particularly in an article called "Fear is the Beginning of Idiocy", While I watched established conspiracy writers, one after the other, lose their minds, succumb to drugs and alcohol or get conveniently taken out, I persisted in this stance of cultivating an inner awareness to further enhance the ability to better comprehend whatever conspiracy is going on in our lives, whether it is within our own homes, in our community, in the country that we live in or on a more global or even on a cosmological scale. I realized that I had been traveling through a rather permutated gauntlet that required more and more of my attention the further I got into it. I would actually taunt some of these internet stalkers that were so persistent in harassing me. Why? It was as if I was alchemically testing this connection to the core of the psyche to see not only if it really existed, but also to see if it really and truly was incorruptible.
To date, I still do not drink or do drugs, nor am I on anti-depressants of any kind. I have come to believe that my involvement with meditation, prayer, holistic health, diet, writing, music and creative visualization has enabled me to withstand this constant buffeting from forces unknown, known and somewhere in between. I have come to believe that a connection with spirit, whatever form that may take for a person, is the most effective means for becoming whole and integral once again. The path is not easy and it was never intended to be. There are many who still attempt to sabotage what I'm doing with healing work primarily through sophisticated, electronic gang stalking, yet through consistent effort and dedication I somehow have surmounted incredible odds. What follows is not only an exposé of trauma-based mind control and the techniques used to create a totally submissive and pliable individual, but certain counteractive techniques that I have employed for myself and others to help unify the psyche and heighten awareness of such things as trigger codes, negative entities, demonic possession and black/chaos magic spells- all as a means of effective and sustained protection. The methods that I have used certainly have been tested, dare I say.... empirically? I’m sure B.F. Skinner himself would laugh at that, Or not considering that his brand of behavior modification has nearly zero effect on me anymore because somehow, someway, I managed to climb out of the Skinner Box I was born in and experience a world filled with joy and love.
TBC
©2024-Jaye B.
Please help support Reset News @ Paypal, Cash App , Ko-Fi or contact the author for other options @ jayeb444@protonmail.com
***
Jaye B. is a writer, musician and artist. His art criticism has appeared in Art Paper, New North Artscape, Art Muscle, Northfield Magazine and elsewhere. His articles have also appeared in City Pages, Twin Cities Reader, Mysteries Magazine, Fahrenheit San Diego, High Plains Reader, New Dawn and Rain Taxi. He has appeared on BBC Radio, WGN Chicago, WLW Cincinnati and elsewhere in the mediasphere to discuss his work. Please help support Reset News @ Paypal, Cash App , Ko-fi or contact the author for other options @ jayeb444@protonmail.com
I sincerely wish you would continue, Jaye. I went through it, too, and you've answered the question of exactly why they stopped with me in one direction and carried on in another almost undetectable direction. So valuable. A light went off inside me. Thank you.
I also know Cathy O'B is a charlatan. Sad but true. Or more like a Magician's Assistant. Even sadder.
Have you read Brice Taylor's THANKS FOR THE MEMORIES?
Thanks again for what you have published. But please keep going.....? I do understand if you don't.
It's obvious to me God has blessed you.
It’s about time Jaye!
I am on the edge of my seat.
The revealing of these occurrences will stand on there own because they are true.
I know this autobiography will help many many people.
Why? Because I still know lots of people who can’t believe the MKULTRA existed, or any of the government mind control programs would be used on children, let alone American citizens.
If you reach 1 single person with your life story it’s worth it all.
I hate to say it this way but I will-- it’s a miracle your still alive ( knowing what I have researched) and brave enough to put this first hand information out there.
I’ll keep praying for ya’. Your a good man.